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no matter how many times i think i cant love mike anymore than i already do, he just and goes and ups it. its so weird to finally have a boyfriend who can stay true to his word.. its just so damn great.. tonight he called me (!!!).. we were talking about blunkett and joking about it... and just talking about how we have to be together.. we used to joke it has to be for BOTH the reasons of being together and me starting my life anew, tonight he just said "i need you". i need you. :) hes the most awesome thing ever!!! why couldnt he be under my tree instead of the ugly blouse my dad gave me??
just sickengly cute, you know??? speaking of gifts... i kinda did pretty decent this yr.. got some ornaments (mostly from work), two pajama sets (one pair im wearing right now.. pink with froggies!!!), a new peacoat (!!!) - which i wont wear till i move, a new dressing gown which is sooo soft and warm, the new michael crichton novel, a picture of my mom, jo and i from when she was here in october, money and best buy gift cards, slippers and gloves (which will be great for england even if they are hideous..) overall christmas 2004 was pretty damn good, i just wish i could have EVERYONE here to share it with.. and ill never ever be able to do that :( its sad but good, cause i know im going to have mike and be apart of his life and start my own thing but at the same time its a end to another part of mine.. and its closing slowly until im actually boarding that plane, for the last time alone, for manchester international. but yeah i hope everyone had what they wished for and more. i may or may not write a reflection of my life of the year.. depends..but if not, heres to the 2005. edited: so its boring this afternoon.. im actually watching tv (granted it a law and order marathon, but thats besides the point.. plus season 2 of little britain still hasnt finished downloading...) and im kinda letting my mind wander.. and seriously why did i let my break up with dan torture me so?? i mean hed been arrested (claims it wasnt his fault) for computer fraud/hacking, always being questioned by the cops, wasnt exactly heading on the right track (yet always claiming to) and he played raw deal (which alone, is worthy enough to break up with someone). i seriously go through life with blinders on until it comes up and smacks me in the mouth. the only good thing that happened was everything that happened, once i was emtionally stable again, i took control of MY life. thats the onyl positive i got from it. but anyways.. i wished while i was with him i posted my fears and all this crap but out of respect to him, i never did. why the hell did i add all of that?! but yeah im just thankful for mike, hes not always perfect, but has never done anything to ever doubt him nor has done anything to shame his family or the name. i just love him lots and lots and lots. |
