utter nonsense

Monday, July 26, 2004

spent all day talking to mike.. it was nice, since we hardly ever get days like this.. usually im running out the door to work or he has to be in bed early so he can get up for work. i cant wait for this to be over and done with and my ass THERE with him, where i belong. it was strnage for us to both be off on a sunday, but like i said, it was nice.. gives me a taste of whats going to happen next week.

jesus, next week. has time blown by that fast, that hes almost here? i didnt think the time would go by so quickly.. next thing you know ill be moving out and going there for his birthday. my life will begin, again, and hopefully for really the last time. no more uprooting, no more trying to settle.. making somewhere my home. home. thats all i want is a home and to be loved. im loved right now, i just need a home.

hes scared that he likes me as much as he does. thats basically what he texted me right before he went to bed tonight. actually, thats EXACTLY what he texted me earlier. i think hes scared, because hes been hurt and doesnt want to get hurt. when i began dating rick, thats what he told me. hell on our first date he told me he loved me. but back to mike, the words being said, are reminding me a lot of rick.. and thats a good thing. i miss that relationship, its the relationship i compare all others i have to. and so far mike is giving me that (and its an awesome thing to find), on sunday all truths will come out..

i know mike wants to be around for the long run, we've been discussing summer plans for next year. we may go to europe (possibly belgium?), though id really like it if we could come back here for a visit to see my mum and sister and possibly catch a dmb concert. but if money cant allow for it, then belgium would be quite nice. take a week off.. travel in by ferry & train.. just get away and be together.. *sigh* its nice to have someone around who wants and is willing to make some sort of plans with you. i mean, hes not scared off. its just crazy.

just totally crazy...


posted by: Kerri at 6:58 am
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