utter nonsense

Monday, May 10, 2004

ew. blogger you went and changed your layout. you suck. :(
give me back the old blogger. NOW!!!!!!!!!
(can you tell i hate change???)

anyways.. i love him. i really love him. i know its soon and everything.. but i just havent felt a bond like this in YEARS. i havent met anyone who makes me want to give up everything for them in so long. yeah sure i moved here to be with dan, but i also wanted out. and dan gave me that. im here on my own.. barely surving, but on my own. so to go to him.. its like yeah. if i go to england, im giving up dmb..since they dont tour there anymore (though dave does some solo shows.. i still prefer the whole band over just him or him and friends). my immediate family. ill have my granddad and cousins there.. and my mums old friends to turn to, but yeah... hes in northern england.. they are all in or just outside london.

im scared if he comes here and we sleep together, he wont come back. or will want me to come to see him in october/november. god this is lame. i love someone so much it hurts and hes THERE and im HERE and yeah. i just want him to not reject me. or feel like i got his hopes up or something. i dont want him to feel cheated or that he wasted his time on me. that happens too much. i always feel like im wasting someones time. instead of them wasting mine. i love him too much to lose him before i even had him.


posted by: Kerri at 2:16 am
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