utter nonsense

Friday, October 03, 2003

so i've been home for a week and miss him greatly.. the good news though, is hes coming home on the 7th :)
and since i havent posted since we found out everything im going to give you a basic rundown of what happened while i was in huntsville..

i was glad i was able to go, because we had heard his mother didnt want us girls (lindsey - david's girlfriend - and i) there and just keep things short but sweet. but right after daniel had booked his flight his mom called and asked for me to come down with him if i coould, so i did. when we arrived, david and lindsey had already landed and both were greatly upset. they arrived with sandra (their mom), and all comforted one another, while lindsey and i stood next to them, getting reaquainted. after daniel consoled his mother and brother for a bit, we got our luggage in his dad's tiny toyotaand took off for his house. i was divided.. in one way i was excited to see where daniel had grown up (well, for the most of his life) and yet sad since the reason why i was there was not for the right reasons.

we finally arrived at the house and it was slightly odd, since phil (his father) had passed there. what they believe to have had happened was either one of two things, but both being massive: a heart attack or stroke. they came to the belief of this, since phil was sitting down and just turned on the tv and it happened then. they cant be exactly sure, since daniel's family is jewish and an autopsy is not allowed (unless legally necessary), but they assume this since when his body was found rigamortis had already settled in and they way he was positioned.

i was allowed to sit shivah with the family before and after the funeral, daniel had to sit early friday morning and david later that night. during david's turn, his mother, i lindsey and all off davids close friends sat in as well. we told dirty stories and jokes and just laughed the whole time away, which, as sandra said, the way phil would have wanted it. we were laughing so hard we must have kept the mortician (or however stays at funeral homes over night to answer calls) up that night with all the laughter. god it was great and it helped sandra so much. she needed it. everytime people asked how we were helping her she kept bringing up that night. i think it helped ease some of the huge pain she was and is feeling.

sunday afternoon, they buried his dad. it was very short and very sweet, and just the way he would have wanted it (and actually what he had requested). i discovered something that afternoon. in jewish culture, close family and friends have the honor of burying the dead. they believe it to be a form of therapy and away of saying we dont want you to go, but if you have to, lets try to take it slowly. his mother told me before we got out of the car that both lindsey and i were welcomed to, if we so chose to. lindsey i knew would do it, since david made her one of the 8 pallbearers. and i also chose to, and felt very honored i was asked. the first time you shovel, you do it four times. the first three, is with the shovel upside down and the last is the proper way. thers meaning to it and i think ive confused it with the the buriel process i mentioned before. daniel and david totally finished the job, with the help of their friends jeff, tim (daniels childhood best friend), mr young (a close friend of his dads), michael (a family friends son) and many others picking up the slack. daniel said it helped him alot and it felt great.. he didnt want to say goodbye.. but no one ever wants to say goodbye to their own dad, do they?

i finally got to meet tim, right before the funeral, and his new fiancee rachelle. they all kept asking if we were engaged, and we both kept saying not yet.. which made me giggle, because he is the one and.. ahh let me not ramble about that right now.. anyways i met tim and his fiancee and what a sweet couple they are. we've been invited to their wedding at the end of november and hopefully we both can attend.

i left on thursday evening to arrive back in philly. it was something we both didnt want to do, but even though my boss said take as long as i need, i know at anytime she could turn her word on me and fire me for being a no show or whatever, so i went home. daniel kept telling me he didnt want me to leave and was going to miss me, as i will with him (and do.. ). we hate being away from one another and i really do believe this break is now the longest weve ever been apart from one another since we met back in january. i told him, even though im not there, he can always turn to me and ill be there. and before we left he double checked to make sure i packed him the teddy bear i bought him for his birthday so hed have it while i was gone. i got to fly home with ein, which was comforting, but no where near as good as having the dan. i also told him, if he needs me back there, i am there at any cost.

and speaking of being there for him at any cost, i missed dmb in central park for him. no biggie, i just wore one fo my gazzilion dmb shirts that day and ran home to check the setlist (which was okay, but i heard they really did a great job at it). and plus, whatever i missed i can see or hear on dvd or cd in the next coming months. and i have my tickets, i can always say i was there.. hehehe.. and i got my some devil with bonus warehouse only cd the other day.. all i cn say is omg this cd is fucking amazing. so so so good. stay or leave brings tears to my eyes everytime i listen to it. just pure beauty.. i swear.. and im sure there are more gems to find with more and more listens.

i guess thats all for now.. i was going to whine about how i miss daniel but you all really dont need to hear that.
the only thing i will say i worry for his mom after the boys leave.. i jsut hope shes going to be okay. i told daniel, if need be, we can pack up and move and go there if we have to. i love this man and do not want to see anything more terrible happen to him ever again. i want to wipe all his pain away and make him feel better.


posted by: Kerri at 8:03 am
Post a Comment