utter nonsense

2007-09-10T18:19:00.000+01:00

its been ages since i logged in. heh.

ive finally managed to land a job (only took me 7 months!) and weve moved into the house and sorta almost settled in (though no housewarming YET) and all that fun jazz.

work is good - quiet and dull but good. im enjoying myself. my colleagues are pretty decent, weve hung out a few times and ive crashed at one (well two since they are housemates) a couple of times. i think sometimes im a little too old, but it seems to work. im close to a couple (d & a) so thats good, they just work on totally different shifts from me so it makes me feel slightly left out or like maybe im miss reading their signals.

i dont want to be making an ass with people i need to work with daily - its embarassing. im sure these people are my friends but i might just be expecting more so soon and it needs to happen. i need to stop being so paranoid.

maybe speak to the dr about going back on my anti-anxiety meds - which i think is the root of me feeling so self-concious (ive butchered that - yay to posting from ie!) about those around me. i feel like im 16 all over again and trying to impress people. ugh. i know i dont have to and should take things as they come, but i dunno. i havent felt this nervous and anxious in a few years. its really pissing me off. grrr. i dont want to go back on the lexapro - i wont be able to drink :( and i LOVE to drink. oh wells. if it helps for a few months and gets me back to normal, then i guess it wont be so bad, right??

anyways, close to a couple of people, espeically A. hes good guy and makes me laugh. when we're drunk we have these really amazing deep thoughtful (well at the time they are deep and thoughful) conversations like i havent had in a long, long time. we're supposed to go to a hockey game together for his birthday in october. which im excited for. i havent been to a ice hockey game in YEARS. too bad its not an nhl game, but its a game and it will suffice for now.

anyways time for a break.

2007-05-28T13:43:00.000+01:00

lots has happened since i last posted. i turned 30, went to america for the first time since i left, met my parents other halfs, bought a home (we have the keys!!) and visited amsterdam. its been a crazy 7 or 8 weeks.

30 was crazy. hyperventilated all day and then sarah, josh, mike, richard and i got wasted. well at least i did. lol. i wanted something bigger but yeah.

we went to the states and that was pretty cool. visited my mom in florida and met her new husband who is okay but yeah. i think hes a little impatient and close minded but im not married to him. its weird though, he has a lot of similar traits as my dad, but i wont dare tell my mother that. shed kill me. lol.

we met up with some detnetters in nyc (adam, chrissy and ray) and had a pretty amazing time. we all got drunk together and thus mike and i missed the last train back to babylon and had to wait until 4.45 to catch the next one. well over 2 hours. mike being drunk wanted to get a cab to get us back but i told him it be too expensive. thankfully chrissy talked him out of it as well. lol. when we finally got on the train, we passed out at around merrick and were woken by the conductor in babylon. lol.

we went to orlando and that was pretty cool. we both were sunburnt and i think i left mikes slippers in the hotel room. he keeps insisting it was on purpose but wasnt. oh wellsat least theyre gone, accident or not. lol. we rode opn a bunch of rides, including the mummy. we both didnt know it was a roller coaster until last minute. i hate those things. anyways we sat down on the seat and right as the damn belt came across our laps to lock us in i tried to get up to get out but it was too late. i was stuck. i cried (bawled actually) through the whole ride and holding onto mikes arm (i think i actually bit him at one point on accident) the entire time. they take those photos of you of how you look on the ride and you can see me crying and holding onto mike for dear life. i feel bad for the others on our ride and had to buy that. lol.

we did massive amounts of shopping (yay to the $2 to £1 exchange rate atm!) and i finally have new underwear for the first time in about 3 years. lol.

chrissy liked us enough to let us know that her mom works for ba and would get us bumped up to club (business) class. we couldnt check in online and had to arrive a little early at jfk for it to work and it did, though we didnt know it at the time.

we checked in at the desk and the woman behind the counter tells us we have an invite for the executive lounge and to proceed there. we were slightly disappointed because we still had steerage seats. so we do some shopping before hand and then proceed to the lounge. we were welcomed and told we will need to recheck in before dinner. we enter and were amazed. theres a molton brown spa, computers, free newspapers. it was like wow. then we proceeded further and saw there were chaise loungers and free food like pot noodles, cookies, fruit and sandwiches.

as were sitting around relaxing (it is heaven in there) we hear our names being paged over the terminal loud speakers (they managed to say my last name right!!) and we report to the front desk again. the woman asks for ouor boarding passes and we say sure. she then takes out mikes visa and proceeds to rip the up. my jaw dropped. i was thinking to myself nooooooooo i need to get home! she then prints out new ones with seats 3 & 4 written on them and tells us to proceed back to the lounge. we sat there gob smacked! we were actually sitting in BUSINESS CLASS. lol. we tried to get the seats we were sitting in originally and they were taken. walk further to the back of the lounge and notice the bar. its FREE. lol. so i sat drinking white wine while mike had some chinese beer. we then notice theres dinner being served so we proceed to the dining area. omg. sooo good. i had some roast beef with potatoes and was in heaven. i forgot what mike ate. lol. we than drank more wine and beer. had a selection of really nice cheeses for dessert. i was full from that alone. lol.

we then proceed to board the plane. before our stuff is stowed away in the overhead im asked if i would like a glass of still water, orange juice or champagne. guess what i took? lol. mike then turns to me and asks where did i get that from? i told him and he laughed. we had those seats that are like beds and just spread out. feet up, shoes off and just chilled. i drank champagne the entire flight. had fillet mignon for dinner, some omg belgian chocolate cheesecake for dessert. hot towels. newspapers. it was heaven. now i know why the rich fly this way. just heavinly. if we ever get married i so want to fly to wherever we go on our honeymoon first class. ahhhhh.

i so owe chrissy a massive favor.

we received the keys to the house two weeks ago. that was a great feeling. we are now home owners. weve bought two sofas (a two and three seater), a king sized bed and a brand new washer/dryer. we bought andrew and catherines old fridge for £70 just to save money. were going to buy a brand new one in the year end during all the clearance sales. we only need to get a cooker and well be okay for now. oh and computer desks and kitchen table with chairs. lol. we have nothing.

jon came to visit two weeks ago so i got to give him a tour of sheffield. lol. he loves this place and agrees with me its a billion times better then london. no pretentiousness or attitude, just really awesome people.

we took him to amsterdam and had a freaking blast. we all got extremely wasted and worn out. i was soooo drunk and stoned it was amazing. i love that city and were planning a massive trip to go back in october time. can not waaaaait. its going to be soooo awesome. <3 to amsterdam

ive also been interviewing again and almost had two jobs. one was really really good, but i was overlooked as the other candidate had SAGE experience where i didnt and another role were i didnt get it because i have too much experience. gah. i went on another interview on friday for a temp to perm role and i think it went pretty well. its with a ms subsidiary though its as receptionist they do promote from within so who knows. id like to get it so im back working with the EOC again. i miss those guys :( well see.

ill post pics to all of the above when they finally get posted. jesus its been a long crazy few weeks. lol.

2007-03-27T13:53:00.000+01:00

holy. shit.

bahahahaha

WARNING POSSIBLY CONTAINS SEASON 3 SPOILERS

2007-03-24T15:42:00.000Z

you know its time for your bf to pop the question when his own mates are asking when are you going to get married. lol.

2007-03-16T16:03:00.000Z

fucking temp agencies. TWO fucking weeks after i finished that assignment im STILL waiting to be paid. fucking hell. bullshit agency.

ive filed a complaint against them and i will deter anyone in sheffield from using search recruiting. fucking cowboys. £@$%£$%$£% im still so god damn mad at what theyve done to me its not even funny. :\

below is the complaint ive sent in:

I had found this agency through a job search on monster.co.uk. I rang them about a business to business customer care role and they said they would see me for an interview. When I came to meet with them, the role was suddenly filled and no longer available. Then they pretty much made me feel forced into signing on for temp work with them, even though I clearly told them I was only interested in straight to perm work.

They called me a few weeks later with an interview for a role at Fletchers Bakery. I was informed that it was a temp to perm, but they didnt know when I would be made perm. I said yes as I was newly back on the job market (I just re-loacted back into the area a few weeks earlier) and thought it would be good experience.

I receive a call a few days later saying they offered me the job. I told them I needed to think it over as this was not what I had asked for (a perm role) and would leave me tied up to look elsewhere. I eventually accepeted the role, but I did inform the agency that I would give it a try.

They sent me my details about the position and time sheets, but failed to send me paperwork to fill out my bank details. I emailed Angela Preston on Feb 22 2007 with those details.

I worked a week and found that the role wasnt for me and requested to leave. I tried to explain this nicely with the agency and stated that it wasnt for me. The work load was very slow and I preferred a faster paced environment. They didnt like this answer and started to speak with me in a very stern tone. I did state to them politely a few times that i would give this a try. After a week it was not to my liking. The company I was working for were upset but undertstood, why couldnt the agency?

That friday afternoon 2/03/2007, I had my time sheet signed by Steven Clark and faxed off my timesheet to their office around 15.45 that afternoon.

On March 9th I went to check my bank balance and noticed I hadnt been paid and rang the agency immediately. This was at 13.00. Around 16.45 I noticed I had not been contacted back and rang the agency again. Amanda answered and was quite curt in her tone with me. I asked why I had not received a call back and she - in a nasty tone - said shed been out of office. She curtly stated that my time sheet was never sent and I would be paid the following friday - March 16th - DIRECTLY into my bank account and then hung up. I didnt get a chance to even defend myself.

I checked my bank details today and noticed I still hadnt been paid. I rang the agency yet again to ask why and they said a check would be posted out to me. I because briefly upset and then quickly apologized for my behavior and stated it was out of order, but Im very upset. I was told I would be paid directly.

I was then put on hold and transfered (but not told I was being transfered) to Amanda Preston. She stated that a check would be posted to me and I should receive it today or tomorrow. I then questioned her as to why she would state I would be paid directly into my account when this wasnt the case? She said they never received my details. I said it was emailed to them as no form was ever sent. I then asked why did they tell me I would be paid directly when I clearly wasnt. That question remained unanswered and the call was ended.

From the start with this company I have felt bullied into signing up for work and roles i did not want and treated like dirt. I am there to make them money not to be walked all over.

2007-03-14T13:51:00.001Z

So apparently my sister slipped on some ice last week and fell, hard. shes broken her pelvis and pubic bones in 6 different places and stuck in Good Sam until medicare can find her a bed in a rehab facility, though shes pretty sure shes going to wind up in a nursing home. Shes in pain but doing alright. Its going to be a long time till shes 100%.

We talked about her going into therapy when everything is said and done and shes heavily considering it. Shes gone through a lot since June 2005 and I dont think she knows how to handle everything thats happened to her. I just hope she gets better soon. Im glad well be there in a month and Ill get to see her. I think its giving her something to look forward to while shes stuck in a bed.

My mum and her husband are taking Mike and I to Universal and Orlando while were there. Leaving West Palm on friday night and return on Sunday. Should be fun. I havent been there in well over 20 years. Hah. I feel old now. But it will be Mikes first time to Florida and you cant expect a Brit to travel all the way to Florida and NOT go to Orlando. Its just not natural. lol. Apparently Universal has all the restaurants and not roller coaster rides. Its a shame that the back to the future ride will be closed by then (closes on my birthday) :( I wonder what we can do for those two days??

we bought a house or something

We bought a house. wewt. And its around the corner from Sarahs. Its lovely. Its 4 floors high and has a finished double cellar and a large attic. Mike said it will be 4 weeks till we get the keys in our hands and then the house will be ours. We'll move in June time as thats when the lease to here is up. Its going to be expensive for a while £500 a month for the first few years as we need a loan to pay for the furniture and such . Oh wells, its ours. heh.

2007-03-12T17:46:00.000Z

ugh blogger seems to have killed the archive link to old posts. gah. cheeky fucking bastards.. so now it appears my archive is gone and you can only view old posts through using the search engine at the top left corner. grrr. i liked that bit a lot. why get rid of it??

2007-02-26T18:31:00.000Z

from wednesday night with the hold steady @ the leadmill.
show was great even got up on stage (and fell) with the band. wewt. the lead singer was clearly on something otherwise id have more videa and probably better sound.

southtown girls wont blow you away....

2007-02-19T17:53:00.000Z

18 years in the making. eighteen fucking years and it looks pretty damn good.

The Simpsons Movie...

2007-02-19T01:24:00.000Z

just some highlights from friday night:

Black Magic, that blows your mind away.....

Setlist is incomplete. Stupid me for drinking :(

fat children
dont let him waste your time
stormy weather
one man show
i will kill again
tonight
auschwiz to ipswhich
(i wrote it down but i lost it)
big julie
disney time
big stuff
black magic
_____________
cunts are running the world
heaven (talking heads cover)
unknown track to myself

he was on stage for about 2 hours. lots of banter with the crowd. rumour has it richard hawley was supposed to be there, but his father passed away last weekend.

2007-02-18T14:54:00.000Z

yeah this commercial makes me go: wtf??

ps: more on jarvis once video has been uploaded. show was AMAZING. best ever, maybe? oh yesh.

2007-02-16T18:29:00.000Z

Career reflections: Former Pulp star Jarvis cocker appears at the Plug, Sheffield

http://www.sheffieldtoday.net/ViewArticle.aspx?SectionID=5108&ArticleID=2050389

Return of the wanderer, with added specs appeal

Career reflections: Former Pulp star Jarvis cocker appears at the Plug, Sheffield

By David Dunn

AS Jarvis Cocker makes his solo performing debut in his hometown tonight and tomorrow he will be surrounded by reminders of his Pulp past in the shape of two very different support acts.

Both shows at Plug – a venue that didn't even exist when the speccy one was last singing Common People to a local crowd – sold out instantly, confirming the enduring popularity of an off-piste artist and wayward musical scholar who shall forever remain the scourge of one Michael Jackson.
After a few years out as a husband, a father, resident of Paris and occasional art commentator in print and on telly, Jarvis began to make in-roads to an almost inevitable solo career when he popped up on a handful of recordings, most notably the recent luscious album by screen beauty Charlotte Gainsbourg.
In total contrast to his brief endeavours with the promisingly shambolic Relaxed Muscle, the lofty bard contributed rich and stirring tapestry to the French star's album, but it barely hinted at where he was heading with his solo album.
Said record, simply called Jarvis, arrived in controversial fashion – prefaced by the political hand-grenade C***s Are Still Running The World.
But the overall result, it has to be said, was a little deflating, bar the wonderful Fat Children and Don't Let Him Waste Your Time. Maybe the relative civility of his domestic life has blunted his sword a little; doubtless the Gallic lifestyle doesn't match up to the rugged persistence of the steel city, even if he recorded the album with his mate and former Pulp guitarist Richard Hawley in a Sheffield studio.
No matter, it's release was greeted with rapture by many and some healthy reviews ahead of the clutch of dates that has him shuffling onto Matilda Street for two nights.
While it is unclear if and how much the singer will touch on his past life as frontman of the 15-year overnight success that was Pulp, Jarvis will be reminded of it on both nights courtesy of the support bands.
In the case of tonight it is the promising Pollinates who open the show, featuring none other than Pulp drummer Nick Banks.
Nick was notable by his absence from Jarvis' band appearance on Jools Holland late last year, despite the presence of other past Pulpers, but all would appear to have been forgiven for what promises to be an interesting night, surely tinted with a little nostalgia regardless of the setlist.
Pollinates also features the ever tactile, trilby-loving front man Paul Infanti (Treebound Story/Richard Hawley/White Trash) with early Warp producer Phil Jones on keyboards.
They make very English pop music, but with a modern edge. It's neither throwaway or up its own trousers and there's a workable mix of youthful outlook to go with the maturity.
Thus far confined to local and London live work, the band - likened to a "poppy" Velvet Underground meets The Flaming Lips - commit their music to a limited run of 7" vinyl soon, in the form of three double-a sides kick-started by Popular Song.
Friday sees another former Pulp cohort – and, there are plenty of them – bring his new band to Plug. Antony Genn now fronts The Hours, a generously-upholstered concern (also featuring former Mescaleros member Martin Slattery) whose Ali In The Jungle single teed up nicely their album Narcissus Road, a genuine grower that utilises Genn's past experience with Joe Strummer, UNKLE and Elastica.
More of them in a couple of weeks ahead of their Leadmill headliner on March 13.

Last Updated: 15 February 2007

2007-02-16T17:19:00.000Z

tonight is the night i see jarvis cocker play a gig here in sheffield. ive been waiting for this night for a VERY long time.

ill post pics and set lists tomorrow.

i also think ive got a job but i need to discuss it with mike more.

2007-02-13T18:57:00.000Z

great article about ryan adams obsessively updating his website: http://www.spin.com/features/magazine/2007/02/07002_ryanadams/

'Awww Sh--, Look Who Got a Web Site'

By: Melissa Maerz

February 9, 2007

How Ryan Adams (of all people) became an Internet visionary.

Illustration by James Blagden

If you put a nickel in the bank every time the word prolific appeared in print before Ryan Adams' name, you'll have saved enough by next year to buy a Ferrari Enzo that's been dipped in beluga caviar and bedazzled with pink sapphires. And if Adams released all the songs he'd written while your funds accrued, making them available for 99 cents each, you still wouldn't have enough money to download them all.

Now, there are probably many complex reasons why Adams -- who put out no fewer than three albums in 2005, including the stellar jam-bandy double disc Cold Roses -- releases so much work. I won't pretend to psychoanalyze his motives, though I believe the simple answer he gave on his website: "I like to play music when I'm not busy playing music." But last December, when he posted 13 very funny novelty albums on his homepage -- attributed to such alter egos as chill rapper DJ Reggie, screamo outfit WereWolph, and bratty punkers the Shit -- I wondered if the move was a direct response to folks who'd complained about his unpruned output on Stereogum a few months earlier. "I have learned how to use a cool thing on my computer which basically allows me now to never ever stop recording music ever," Adams wrote on ryan-adams.com, "Which is going to be great news for all my adoring fans." To wit: You think I've recorded too much? Wait until you hear my 113,236,857th record, an ode to every idea I've had since lunch.

The funny thing is, Adams probably has more in common with those who read Stereogum than he thinks. His faux hip-hop and punk tracks like "Awww Shit, Look Who Got a Web Site" and "1-800-WWW.COM" just underscore the speed of the hype machine he's bucking. Accelerated technology breeds accelerated culture, and in a blogosphere obsessed with newness (breaking unheard bands, leaking forthcoming albums first), Adams' hyperproductivity seems like a smart move -- or at least a knowing wink. If there's one thing DJ Reggie tracks such as "Unicorns (Prob. Don't Exist)" can teach you -- besides that the fact that unicorns probably don't exist -- it's that pumping out a new song every hour might be the only way to keep up in this Band of the Day age. Every time you hear a new Ryan Adams song, an angel updates his blog.

Strangely, the biggest complaint people have posted about Adams is the same argument out-of-touch pundits once used about the Internet: There's too much information out there, and not enough of it has been edited. It's surprising that the same people who celebrate the Web for breaking down mainstream media's cultural gatekeeping now want something very old-fashioned: a new filter to tell them which of this stuff is any good.

Sure, Ryan Adams could never whittle his career down to a greatest-hits collection. But the best thing about him -- and about the blogs that write about him -- is that there's no pressure to package things for a large audience. Their appeal is that they inspire loyalty from a relatively small group of devotees. Online, the sheer availability of self-expression is already turning mass culture into a conglomeration of niches, and Adams -- who has recorded a Jacksonville country album, a Midwestern bar-rock album, a Smiths-inspired brooder album, a backpacker rap album, a Deadhead noodler album -- is a niche rocker for our times. You want a hip-hop song about the history of the pyramids? He's written several of them. And maybe that's what it means to really connect with an artist: feeling as if he wrote something specifically for you.

These days, it takes almost as much effort to be a Ryan Adams fan as it does to be Ryan Adams. And I suspect that's the way Adams wants it. He's created an environment that leaves no room to surf through the latest, hottest MySpace bands: Listening to all of his music takes time. Time to ponder the political feasibility of WereWolph's "Dead People Unite and Take Over." Time to understand the subtle differences between the Shit singles "Drinking Hard," "I Drink Too Much," "Drunk as Hell Again," "Drunk and in Jail for Arson," and "Passed Out in AA -- Fuck." Time to figure out if the Shit's "When Pants Become Toilets" could be turned into a Fox TV show. On that December day when Adams issued the first 11 albums, I spent eight hours listening to all of them, trading e-mails with friends about the genius of WereWolph's "Throw Up on the Moon," debating with coworkers about whether DJ Reggie's backing tracks could pass for Neptunes beats, laughing when Adams cracks up on DJ Reggie's "Blanky Night Time Friend." Some people may think there are more important things to do with one's afternoon -- say, breathing or eating. But I haven't spent that many hours with one musician since I was 16 (which, coincidentally, happens to be the last time I was too stoned to figure out how to eject a CD). And if Adams continues on this path, I look forward to spending another 1,274,123,657,586 days just like that.

Melissa Maerz is Spin's associate editor. Taken from the Feb. 2007 issue of Spin.

2007-01-18T01:29:00.000Z

So my sister is moving back to to the states and pretty much fucking us over. Im not too shocked bein this is my family and none of them are reliable. I thought my sister was but I was wrong. Its okay though, shes an adult and free to make her own mistakes, I just wish she could see out a god damn promise. But I guess thats what makes me better then her, even if my parents still see me as the evil one.

My mom is cancer free, so Im glad. No funerals to rush home to or anything nasty like that.

My mother is pulling drama on me and I dont know how to take it. Ive tried to keep in touch with her without her driving me mad. Which is good, but aparently not good enough for her. I could treat her lilke I do my father and only speak with him for maybe two hours a year, but I choose not to because I know that would upset her and cause a rift between my mother sister and I. As Im already labeled the bad one, I choose to do the latter. So much so as I pay for our phone calls, I tried to keep in touch. I havent as of late due to my sim card being lost and it had EVERYONES numbers and info on it. Ive also lacked a phone line until last week - which is now out of service thanks to having to have to have DSL and the fact the fucking installers are idiots and unhooked our voice line and didnt plug it back in!!!!! - and Ive also lacked internet. In fact Im posting this on an unsecured network. with Mike new iMac. I cant call and cant regularly email, she is aware of this, but didnt make any effort to be in touch with me and leaving everything on my FLAKEY sisters shoulders.

I reach my sister tonight to talk to her as I can not reach my mother and basically Im to blame for everything and my mother pretty doesnt much want anything to do with me because when I mention Mike and Is trip back to the US Ive failed to mention to her directly that we're seeing her. Which is just fucking drama. Ive mentioned to her NUMEROUS of times that we plan on going to sunny old retirement-ville to see her and her bf. Ive mentioned in the almost 3 years Mike and I have been together they HAVE to meet the next time we're back in the States together.

Im sorry if Im more excited to get back to my favorite place in this world and cant wait to be enthralled by it again. Thats not my fault, shes the one who choose to leave and move to florida, not mine. It was always our plan to go to florida for a long weekend, it was just deciding on and when and where we were going. In fact because Ive been without communication I havent been able to tell her Ill be back in the states from April 10th to the 24th. She could pick up a phone to discuss this WITH me, but she CHOOSES not to. She knows full well Im without HER number (my lovely sister refused to give it to me) and for the 5 minutes Ive had internet since dec 22nd Ive contacted her with all contact numbers and addresses. She chooses to ignore those emails it is not my fault.

She says Im not warm to her, Im not affectionate enough, I cant be with all the crap shes put me through. And I wont be. I love her dearly but theres issues there that cant be resolved unless we're in group therapy together. With me being here in the UK and her there, I doubt thats going to happen.

Im not a bad daughter, just one whose been to enough shrinks and to know who to keep where in my life.

2006-12-15T22:03:00.000Z

Long time no post. heh.

So I'm moving AGAIN. We're going back to the UK, well we actually are in the process of doing this. Hes back in Sheffield, back at plusnet (boooooooooooooooooooo) and found us a flat.

I dont want to go, but what am I going to do, give him up for a so-so job at Accenture/Microsoft that may not be there in 5 years time (as thats when Accentures contract is due to expire) and yeah.

We're buying a house together in the next year. Talks of getting engaged and all that jazz. Life is happening. We're getting older and more mature. Whats next? Kids? God I hope not. I like giving those things back when theyre dirty, cranky, or whatever. We're creating a life together. I guess thats pretty fucking awesome and worth the move. I hope. lol. This is me, so in 6 months I could be posting about a suicide attempt or something overly drastic.

I mean things are good with us, probably why I haven't posted in over 6 months. We're busy, we're doing things. Concerts and the such (one of the main reasons I dont want to go).

I was lucky enough to see Mr David Ryan Adams perform for almost 3 hours back in October. Probably one of the highlights of my life. I was lucky enough to hear everything I wanted to (well pretty much) and was blown away by Ryans attitude (no temper tantrums and 100% sober! yay!) I paid over €200 for the pair of tickets but it was totally worth it. <3 Ryan. I would pay that much again for the same show.

My sister is living here now. In fact shes taking over our place from us for the next 6 months. shes landed herself a job without trying. Im proud of her.

My mum was operated on for breast cancer today. They took out a lump and going to test it. I think shes going to be okay as they didnt keep her longer then what she was supposed to be and they are giving her radiation therapy. I think I was more upset over her developing diabetes then this. *shrugs*

OHHH. I received my first taste of medical attention abroad. WOOO. I had to be rushed by ambulance to St James hospital here in Dublin because I had an evil gallbladder. I had a 1.5mm stone that was reeking havok on me. I was on morphine n everything. Go me! I was out of work for almost 2 weeks and now I have thre little scars on my tummy. Im just mad because it was the pill I was forced to switch to that caused all of this. Gah :( So since september Ive been off the pill just because it sucks.

The new Jarvis Cocker and Hold Steady albums are currently kicking my ass.

I belong to last.fm if any of you want to friend me, user name is alternageek ;)

I need to update my template. This is so emo.

PS Happy birthday to my blog, its now 4!. Jesus christ time flies.

Ill be posting more once my computer is over in the UK and Ill be out of work for some time.

PPS Im using the new blogger beta. so far so good.

2006-07-15T00:49:00.000+01:00

it could be the wine or whtaever, but bono is the sex in this video.
(ryan adams cover)

2006-07-04T18:43:00.000+01:00

guess who is my friend on myspace??

aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHits jarvis cocker. i know i know hes not really my friend but yeah im excited. im only like 90,0000000000 people away from him but fuck jarvis cocker?

ooh heres his myspace: http://www.myspace.com/jarvspace
check out his new song its really good.

2006-06-28T22:05:00.000+01:00

yeah its been a while (over a month) and i think the longest ive gone without blogging.. the internet is kinda boring to me now... dont know why, just is.. or probably because i hate making mike move so i can get out of the office when i want to..

just gunna post a few things:

mike updated his photo gallery with pictures of pretty much everything from the past 6 or so months.. might want to take a quick look around:
http://gallery.mikegrice.com/main.php

been on (always am....) on a 80's kick.. heres some ABC (one of sheffields finest...) and some roxy music with brian eno to keep you entertained. i swear i was born about 15 years too late. i would have soooo been the coolest new wave kid in the world. and i really think 1980s alternative really goes under appreciated by people.. oh wells.

2006-05-25T22:58:00.000+01:00

a few quick things:

- my clothes FINALLY came. they apparently took a trip to england, then france then norway and finally they made it dublin. only took two fucking months. the flip flops id ordered if theyd arrived i probably wouldnt hadnt slipped on those fucking stairs. #$@%#@$%

- im addicted to big brother. mike hates it, but im LOVING it. seriously, the american version could learn a thing or ten from these freaks. less then a week in and not only has someone walked out but big brother has also kicked someone out for breaking the rules. big brother this year is evil. they didnt give people their suitcases when they got in, they had to earn them. 3 people didnt earn theirs and are up for eviction. those who remain will never get their suitcases while they remain in the house. EVIL. muhahahaha. gotta love it.

- its may 25th and im still wearing a fucking winter coat to work. i hate this countrys weather. fucking give me spring not december weather, god damnit. grrr.

2006-05-21T15:18:00.000+01:00

so this:

is a GREAT parady of:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHzAm2WgTBU

both ads are brilliant in their own rights..

2006-05-16T22:34:00.000+01:00

back from spain, will post pictures when uploaded to where ever they may go to.
it was beautiful sans the two overcast days we had and the travel agency booking us into the wrong hotel (which caused mikes mum to be robbed of about $100 and giving us leverage for a transfer to a larger, bigger and better hotel in magaluf)

got lots of sunburn (mike, of course, took pics) did lots of shopping (im still mad i didnt pick up the lacoste bag i fell in love with) and fucked up my back (marble floors and flip flops dont mix well)

my clothes, that i orderded, didnt arrive on time so my mom forced my sister to buy me some things so i had something to wear. which was great.

my sister is now living in the UK and not too far from mikes mum. which is cool. i still think she should have waited a bit (shes already had a handful of growing pains in her first 48 hours there) before she made such a huge move. but its her life and i cant stop her. i gave her my bank card and info so she can at least get her pay packets deposited and she can have access to her money. its temporary until everything comes through and shes eligible to open a bank account in the uk. she was pissed i gave it to her until i explained how everything works there. hopefully shes appreciating my efforts for her. i told her i want all my stuff back once she has her account open though.

anyways, sitting in this computer chair is killing my back so i better end this here. will post more soon once ive settled on where the images are being hosted.

2006-04-23T21:01:00.000+01:00

so i did my good deed of the day, probably even month, today.

we went for brunch in city centre today at the metro cafe off south williams street and loved it as usual. (highly recomend the metro special with a bagel. so yummy and scrumptcious. we love this place - cheap, fast and great - and pretty much take everyone who stays with us there for a sunday brunch) we're walking back and grab some cash for tomorrow morning, i pick up some gerbera daisies for the house and walk to the LUAS to take us home.

as we're waiting for the tram to get there, i overhear 4 elderly (maybe mid to late 60's???) ladies asking how to get to the Charlamont stop. since its only like 2 stops from st stephens green, i decide to give em some help. apparently some chav girl told them they need the RED line to get to their hotel - when their hotel & stop is actually on the GREEN line. they asked someone for help but she got really curt and was really rude to them. i mean i hate tourists just as much as anyone, but you can totally see that it was these ladies first trip abroad together and it doesnt kill to be nice and helpful.

anyways, i jump in and start sorting the ladies out. im calm with them, listen and tell them where they need to go. they dont have tickets (apparently the hiltons courtesy bus dropped them off in town) so i help them select their fare and show them how to pay for it. i then direct them to the tram they need and find them a spot to sit. they were ever so grateful. when the tram stopped at Charlamont, i held the doors open (even though the tram driver was trying to close them on me, you just cant rush american tourists!) and showed them how to get downstairs to their hotel. they thanked me as i was leaving and asked if i was american. they smiled and laughed when i said i was. they blessed my "pea picking heart" lol. it was just great

ive never seen a group of women so happy. lol. and seriously, if people ever question why i do CSR, thats why. the look on peoples faces when you help them and they are lost. its the greatest feeling in the world. or at least gives you a happy laugh out of it.

2006-04-18T23:32:00.000+01:00

i hate when i have a great idea about a post and then i just start fucking rambling.

i had this huge thing written out and with call outs and all (wee e-drama!) but i decided to be an adult about it and scrap it. so this is whats going to remain of it.

also mike is re-wroking detnet. personguy needs to join ufck, his style would slide right in, kinda like that mineral eniema he did a few years back.

2006-04-11T22:23:00.000+01:00

so i know this kid, he posts on the same forum as i do. the kid was given some tracks by someone. fbi comes to his house in late augusts, seizes his harddrive asks him questions and tells him hell be okay.

fast forward to march 2006 and this is what happens. he is facing up to 11 YEARS in FEDERAL PRISON plus fines up to $750,000 and all because he leaked - to die hard fans and not some i33t hax0r group - four tracks to DIEHARD-we're-going-to-buy-the-album-anyhow fans. most people said the leak actually HELPED the sales of jacksonville city nights, since fucking lost highway couldnt be bothered to do much promotion for it. gah. gah. gah.

fuck the riaa.

Feds Bust Fans For Pirated Ryan Adams Tunes

March 10, 2006, 10:30 AM ET
Brooks Boliek, The Hollywood Reporter
A pair of apparent Ryan Adams fans ran afoul of a new law making it a crime to publish songs before their release to the general public when they made portions of the singer's latest album available on a Web site frequented by his fans.

Robert Thomas of Milwaukee and Jared Bowser of Jacksonville, Fla., were indicted under a provision of the Family Entertainment and Copyright Act (FECA) law that makes it a separate federal crime to pirate music and movies before they are released to the public, Memphis-based U.S. attorney Jim Vines and FBI special agent My Harrison said.

The indictments are believed to be the first under the prerelease provision of the 2005 FECA law. The men are alleged to have posted portions of Adams' 'Jacksonville City Nights' on a fan Web site about a month before its official release last September. Adams records for Lost Highway Records, whose Universal Music Group parent did not grant authority for the Internet distribution.

'Any perception that copyright violations are victimless crimes is just plain wrong,' Vines said. 'Whether stolen intellectual property is given away or sold by thieves for a profit, the rightful owners of such property are still hurt. Many individual and corporate victims of copyright crimes live, work and create here in the middle district of Tennessee, and persons who knowingly violate federal copyright law face serious consequences whether or not they intend to harm anyone. Federal copyright violations are both a national and local priority and will be aggressively prosecuted in this district.'

If convicted on all counts, the defendants each face a potential of 11 years in prison. The case was investigated by FBI agents and is being prosecuted by the Computer Hacking and Intellectual Property Section of the United States "

2006-03-29T23:06:00.000+01:00

when did i become OLD? i mean tomorrow, well in less then an hour actually, i will be turning 29. twenty fucking nine. i cant wrap my mind around it. this time next year ill be THIRTY. i am NOT old. why am given an old age? heh.

even my friends are getting old. sarah is buying a house. people are getting married, some are even having BABIES. BABIES?!?!? wtf. none of us should be doing this. we should be out drinking, getting high and being annoying. not falling into "the middle". life is more then just this. i mean its great and all, but not NOW. i just want another few more years till im going to be 30. not 365 days.. days...

jesus. when my mum was my age she was married, owned a home and was about to become pregnant with me.. and i cant even keep my bank account in the positive. gah. this is NOT happening. nononononono its just not. :[ i dont want to be 29. i think im just going to be turning 28 till im ready to turn 29. heh. hows that sound?

i dont know. mike thinks im being ridiculous at the moment.. i dont think he GETS it. hell i dont even think i get it.

2006-03-21T22:00:00.000Z

i was bored with my myspace profile so i did this:

Currently playing on my iPod:

(as of 21/03/2006)

and i dont know why. heh.

2006-03-20T16:34:00.000Z

muahahahahaha.
my job yeah its fucking cool. so fucking cool it has its own god damn starbucks in it. now if i only liked and drank coffee, id be in heaven right about now.

2006-03-19T16:56:00.000Z

as professor farnsworth would say: I HAVE GOOD NEWS EVERYBODY! oooh.

from the nerds at slashdot:
http://slashdot.org/articles/06/03/19/1417253.shtml

Futurama Returns

Posted by CmdrTaco on Sunday March 19, @10:07AM
from the good-news-everyone dept.

Television

riflemann writes "Another 26 episodes of Futurama will shortly go into production! This news comes from none other than Billy West (voice of Fry) himself, in a short post to his own message board. No further details are available, except that it's likely to be on TV, not straight to DVD." The best news is that means fresh quotes for slashteam to hide in the source code.

and from Billy Wests (he does the voice of Fry plus others) own website/forums
http://www.billywest.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=2011&PN=1
(2nd post down)

Welcome Parker 151,

Thanks for your post! I hope you realize that this is your last--- naw,just
kidding! I'm glad that you got to see that stuff and you laughed.
I've talked extensively about this subject.Here's a little of the story.

All the stuff you see or hear from when I was on-- ended 11 plus years
ago.Some of the audio replays are from 16 years ago.I got out when I was
at the peak of my radio career.You rarely get a second chance to go out
on top like that.I was all done with it in 1995.I started in Boston in
1981.That's 25 years ago.I'm a radically different guy than I was then.But
it's so pissa' to see this ''internet arguement'' continue until people's
fingers fall off.I'm just tending my garden and when a few A-holes attack
me over this stuff,I just give 'em the old ''digitus impunicus.''

I'm thisclose to selling my show--''Billy Bastard--Amateur Human Being,''
And the other good news is that they're doing 26 new episodes of
''Futurama'' for TV and we're hammering out the deal now.The original
plan was to have the DVD's first but that's no longer the case.I'm totaly
jammed dude.

Greetings from the year 3000! It still sucks!

Billy

hows that for fucking awesome??? bahahahaha.
lets just hope it doesnt pull a family guy and just go down the shitter when it returns. *sigh* either way, its still fucking great news!

2006-03-13T12:05:00.000Z

i have a very important annoucement to make:

I GOT THE MUTHA FUCKING JOB!@!#@~#~@#!!1111!!ONE2#$$#@#

and i couldnt be happier.
im working for microsoft (mike got the okay from work so there would be no worries in conflicts of intrest) and i start next week and yeah. oh boy. moneymoneymoneymoneymonemyomeyoemyoqwerjiopjsadfkohdoif im just happy not to be sitting on my ass all day. :bananas.
$%@#$^%%@@

working is good. and hopefully this is the last work announcement ill have to make for a very, very long time.

2006-03-09T13:01:00.000Z

running a live ubuntu cd at the moment. its seems to be intresting. i think when vista is released ill be using ubuntu for my pc/web browsing needs and looking into getting a mac mini for media and other things linux cant do too easily.

i do like it and wish i could post you my screen shot but apparently the image is too big to upload :( bollocks. wait. photobucket will. i dont know how big they resized this too but here:

its kinda nice, certian things like myspace and even blogger (even though its windows based) look better under the linux platform. hmmm...

ooh i may not have to go to a macmini. hah! apparently the oragami thing microsoft has been hyping is going to run about $500 (according to reports from cnn.com) that would be really intresting ro run that and have a linux desktop... hmmm.....

i still dont know if i have that accenture job or not thanks to telewest fucking around with my reference. its taken almost a week to get this information out to me and its driving me mad. without this referal i lose a €22,000 (about $26,000 US) a year position located within microsoft. #@!%$%^$^#$@%#$ its really pissing me off. its a job i want and need and plus it casual dress and located only 4 tram stops from here. id be commuting in the opposite direction of the rush hours and yeah. grrrrr. i NEED this job. :/ but who the fuck knows. the last person i spoke with at telewest said it had been posted to my temp agency and they said they would re-fax it to simone at cpl before noon. its 13.15 now and i havent heard from simone if shes received it or not. gah. :(

update: 13.54
called cpl, they received the email but cant open the attachement. #%!#$^%@%^ its been sent to cpls' IT team to see if they can open the file. can anything not go smoothly for me?!?!

anyways i need to go shower and post some shit off. heh.

2006-03-07T12:50:00.000Z

new x-men 3 trailor up:
http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox/tls/trailer/large.html

and it looks fucking awesome. and my girl rogue looks GREAT!

2006-03-06T16:01:00.000Z

enjoy. live action sequeunce of the opening credits to the simpsons courtesy of skyone.
rumour has it, it was directed by matt groening.

2006-03-02T22:36:00.000Z

still bored. waiting for the boy to get in. so i threw on some music i downloaded months ago. currently listening to:

maybe if i get really really bored, ill come back and edit this and post what i listened to during the day today. maybe. hell if i wasnt going to work, id post daily what im listening to. heh. yeah.

2006-03-02T21:28:00.000Z

just because im bored and want to flaunt it - my current desktop:

- new rainlender skin
- new style xp skin
- old background, but looks sweet with this new look

2006-03-02T18:50:00.000Z

2nd best news all day:

http://www.tvsquad.com/2006/02/28/arrested-development-rumors-abound-ad-being-picked-up-by-showti/

Arrested Development rumors abound: AD being picked up by Showtime?

Posted Feb 28th 2006 4:38PM by Joel Keller
Filed under: FOX, Showtime, Premium Cable, Industry, Programming, Arrested Development
Arrested Development: picked up by Showtime?Rumors are rampant that Arrested Development has been picked up by Showtime for a 26-episode order. Page Six in the New York Post floated that story this morning, in fact (which was replayed on Salon.com).

However, that's all they are right now: rumors. Fellow Squadder Ryan j Budke found out from his source at Showtime, who is close to the negotiations, that they are still in talks about the show and nothing is official yet. There may be an official announcement later in the week, but that's about the only information we've been given.

Don't worry: if word comes out that AD has been officially picked up, we'll have it for you.

and

http://www.nypost.com/gossip/pagesix/60385.htm

February 28, 2006 -- THAT fans of "Arrested Development" can relax. Word is Showtime not only picked up the canceled Fox show but also ordered 26 more episodes . . .

two unconfirmed sources, but it sounds really really good. love love love this. needs to be kept on the air forever. and ever. okay 5 more seasons, but it will feel like forever! <3

may have the bestest news of today tomorrow. i should have a jobby job. :banana dance

2006-03-01T16:57:00.000Z

My Personal Dna Report
its sorta me. though mike thinks ive gotten pretty cocky and know it all like. heh.

2006-02-27T18:09:00.000Z

i love him so much. like each day we're together, it seems like i love him more and more and vica vera. i keep asking myself "how the fuck did -i- get so damn lucky???" seriously hes soo wonderful. *sigh* im just wonderfully lucky

i still hate interviewing. my temp role ended after two days, which sucks because i was hoping for like €200 euros and not less than €100. still waiting for a call for more work during the week. i hate this waiting shit.

the washing machine is dying a slow and painful death. took over 6 hours to spin the fucking sheets. i finally have the sheets in the dryer and the duvet is back in the washer going for a spin. gah. i was hoping to have all the wash done today so i wasnt running around tonight. blah. i need mike to let the landlord know because i cant live without a washer. i feel so old for typing that out. gah. heh at least i got to finally vacuum the living room since we removed all the cardboard and tesco boxes. heh.

also thanks for reading my blog and your kind words :)

2006-02-21T18:21:00.000Z

six degrees of kevin bacon......

ahh ive finally got some work... its a week somewhere in city centre. and its paying €10 an hour... money is money, though the emergency tax is going to kill me, at least i can give mike some money for something, instead of mooching off him... i hate not having my own money and not being able to support myself properly. :(
plus ive been getting anxious and nervous and not very pleasant to be around because of it. oh wells, at least it gets me out of the house for a week and its money. hopefully ill get that MS job they called me for back on thursday. thats be pretty sweet cause id be working similiar hours to mike annnnnnnnnd wed work around the corner from each other, so ill be getting him out of bed before 9am. lol. plus it starts at like €24k. heh.moneymoneymoney....

2006-02-17T10:29:00.000Z

hmm remember corrine billy rae. i think her single "put your records on" might be one of the bigger tracks of the spring/early summer. now to find the damn single to upload.

2006-02-16T16:29:00.000Z

the seagull got all the leprechauns lucky charms.
rats with wings.. thats all they are...

2006-02-14T18:39:00.000Z

happy vday.
i still hate temp agencies
cheney shot someone while hunting. that so brings about the LOLs

we saw walk the line last night courtesy of his work. such an amazing film. needless to say, we're both on a cash kick and ive downloaded like 4 of his albums today. he is the original punk rocker. i dont care what anyone says. i grew up listening to cash, and willie nelson and other country artists, but cash always stood out with me.

anyways enough rambling. i just thought id post a ghey update.
ps. you can hear the wind whirl through where there was a fireplace in the house

2006-02-10T19:13:00.000Z

have i mentioned how much i fucking HATE temp agencies and interviewing?? god damn. all ive done the last two days is freeze my ass off, get lost, not get any work and wasted two days where i could have been doing something some what productive (ie: cleaning the house) but wasnt because they had me on a wild goose chase through out dublin..

one place, planet recruitement, contacted me mere moments after i sent my CV through on some job site. should have known that was bad news. anyways, lady calls me says she has a 3 month to perm position with a company called stream. tells me about it and im like great, im game for work. so i accept the interview. get in, find out the job is in dublin three on the north side of town and i need to get the DART to get there. im like okay, im sure i can find that. she gives me instructions. the damn stop is past trinity college and at least 15 walking minutes. over the phone she said the position itself was 20 walking minutes from st stephens green. bull - fucking - shit. anyways. go to the interview, and its only a 6 week (at the most) position and its only a temp. i would have been fine if it was a 3 month temp but its gah. anyways. i didnt get the position cause i was over qualified - i think - but according to her, she said it was because i didnt give more valid specifics. well he said i didnt have to since i "was more then obiviously qualified" and even wrote down "N/A" on the interview sheet. but whatever.

same lady, when she calls back to say i didnt get the position says she has another job offer for me in an area called blanchettestown or something. i told her, originally, i can only work in city centre as i lack transportation AND i dont know the city very well as i just moved over 12 days ago. she says its a 30 minute bus ride there and THEN a shuttle bus will pick me up and drive me another 10 minutes to the place. im like i CANT take the interview since its not near me at all. i need to work in the "even" numbers of town. she asked "well cant you move to be closer to city centre?" i told her "im 20 minutes away as it, how much closer do you want me to move?" she got quiet. i dont think im hearing from her again. im okay by that.

today, i was sent to BT by manpower. who arent normally my favourite people, but mike recomended them since work uses them. so i get a call from a Carl today asking to interview at 2.30 and to meet face to face. im like cool, i can take my time do some errands and then stop by and meet this guy in my jeans and stuff. nope not happening.

i then get a call from a Laura, asking me to come by and tointerview for BT. i say okay give me an hour or so cause i literally just woke up and wasnt expecting to come in till later. she got curt and said okay 12.30 BUT my interview wouldnt be till 2pm. im like is there any way i can meet you later, as its cold out and i dont want to be sitting around in some reception area for an hour. shes like not really.. i said ill be there at 12.30. come i meet with her. she calls me a know it all cause i didnt have my last job long (due to mike) so im still fresh to the interview processes. i dont need to be told how to answer questions for a CSR role. anyways she gives me some catty comment on how im dressed (im freezing so im still wrapped in peacoat, hooded jacket underneath, scarf and gloves - hat is in hand) and sends me off. i go to the interview, its right up my alley but i didnt get it (its uuuh 19.21 on friday and the position starts on monday) and im cool with that. im pissed that she didnt call me back to let me know how it went and that i didnt get it. when i did call her she said "youll hear from us either way" then hung up. yeah fuck you. im MAKING YOU MONEY dont treat me like dirt. cunts.

yeah so im wound up and pissed off, on the walk back from BT i just cried and wanted to bring mike (and google) back to sheffield with me. i hate hate hate it here.

2006-02-08T19:05:00.000Z

i have an interview tomorrow. i fucking hate interviews. :\ i hate trying to sell myself and being smiley. i hate being questioned and judged. grrr.

though, work is work. hopefully i get it. if i do, its a temp to perm position and its about €20,000 a yr. id be working with "outsourced" call centre and the company id be dealing with would be nikon. and its monday through friday 9 - 5. hopefully not too bad. ill just try to wow em as best as i can and not be nervous. money is money. heh and i need it. the sooner the better.

now i just need to find the temp agency and the building i need to go to. hmmm.

2006-02-07T19:23:00.000Z

got my letter from the irish goverment with my PPS number on it today, so i guess i really need to stay here now. i also opened up a bank account with AIB. we need to get a joint checking account and decided if we went with the bank hes already at, even if they suck, it be easier then trying to transfer money from my (or his account) with another bank into where we have our joint acct at. i also need somewhere to deposit my paycheck since ireland and england arent keen on cutting cheques to deposit/cash. so yeah i have my own acct and it only took ten days, compared to uhh the 7 fucking months it took in england.

im making dinner. well its sitting in the over cooking. its a lamb caserole, since he likes lamb and i think i liked it. heh. if not i can eat the potatoes and gravy. plus we had raviolis and sauce left over from last night i can reheat later on. anyways, we need a crock pot. we like traditional meals like this. plus we like soup. and its easier to make stews and soup with a crock pot then sitting at home watching over a stove.

anyways i need to check on dinner and see if its ready. or at least let it simmer till he gets in.

2006-02-05T22:24:00.000Z

some pictures of the move/guiness factory tour

holyhead, wales in the background
(i purposely didnt get any images of the EVIL snakepass)

mike & james on the ferry. james needed a smoke.
though james' grin is kinda evil....

sun setting over the irish sea....

sun setting over dublin, ireland.
photo taken from the front of the ferry in a viewing area.

my goodness, my guinness!

view of dublin from the "gravity bar" at the guinness factory.

two guinness' for one man.

hippies can drink more then cider. and geeks love their guinness.
plus you can see james' beard in this pic.

2006-02-05T21:48:00.000Z

so tonight i cooked and didnt kill us (yet)
bought some filets from tesco and potatoes (intended to bebakled, but wound up mashed) and made this recipe sans the mushrooms, cause mushrooms are gross. yummy filets with creamy paprika sauce. i think it took me under a half hour to prepare AND make - which rocks.. i impressed myself, i cut an onion (without crying!) and prepared fresh garlic - which was something ive never done before and was able to do with my love of drooling over the food network. though next time we're making it with brocoli and carrots just to add some more colour to the plate and to make it a lil more filling. i served some cheesecake for desert. needless to say, we're full and the recipe has been added to my betty crocker cookbook.

im attempting to make braised lamb later in the week. well see how that comes out. tomorrow night is raviollis and sauce with garlic bread. thats pretty easy to prepare and make. and shouldnt take as long as making a roasted chicken.

i think hes going to kill me sharing this office. i think im distracting him too much and he keeps asking me when im going to go watch south park... sigh.

i need to go to manpower tomorrow and speak with someone cause i emailed them my cv and got back some stupid link to go to xerox. needless to say im still going to go over and forward my CV to them, i just hope i can get there, since im in dublin 14 (south?) and the position is in dublin 15 (north?). and yeah i just need work. being home all day sucks.

2006-02-05T00:00:00.000Z

hmm we have a office now. and most things are unpacked, except for a few things here and there, otherwise were now living together. creepie.

we (well he did - since im poor and out of work) bought a microwave and a food processor. and some batteries. and some brita refills. and 2 surge protectors. spent too much money in argos (which is hidden in the dundrum mall, since posh people dont need to buy things cheaply) and had to take a taxi (from the hidden taxi round as well) home. and then spent the day unpacking and building one huge desk and a wicked heavy bookshelf. at least my computer is set up and were not using the kitchen table as our office.

our house now looks like people LIVE here and not in a constant motion of coming and going, if that makes sense. its nice. lets just hope we can now afford the next 8 or so months, though i hope were here for the next 20 months as i dont want to move again.

2006-02-02T10:58:00.000Z

note to self: need to find hot chips "over & over" to download and spread to the world.
wicked cool video. once im back on my widows machine i can copy and paste and link.

thats one of the few things i hate about macs. and laptops. i love desktops. i dont think ill ever stray and get something inexpensive for a laptop and spend more on the desktop.

i got my pps number. took less then 5 minutes. it was awesome. when i moved to the uk it took me a month to get my national insurance number and i had to go through an interview and everything. grrr.

graham coxon (ex-guitarist for blur) is wicked yummy.

ive decided goldfrapp is too coked up for her own good. the video for white horse is bizarre and disturbing :( ugh. though the boys in it are yummy though coagted in garbage :/

ps. i need to move the caps lock key. it gets in my way.

2006-02-01T11:52:00.000Z

so im here. heh.
its intresting so far. starting over is a lil easier then last time... im just sick of doing it. today i have to go get my pps card or something. im thinking its like your national insurance card. no idea, but apparently i need one to work. i also need mike to re-forward me my cv so i can start applyng for work. rent here is almost $2k a month and mike cant afford to do it on his own and the money i have in the bank i cant use at them moment for rent as i need it for spending money, etc so he doesnt have to take care of me and i can still run errands while im home.

our desk arrived yesterday. so hopefully by the weekend we can move our office out of the kitchen and into the office. heh. it be nice to get the kitchen back. really nice. its weird serving dinner and having to move around x amount of laptops, towers and monitors. machines out number humans in this house. its so bizarre.

i still HATE the snakepass from sheffield to manchester. the english need to fuck views and put up road barriers so you dont die. or at least put something up so you dont see the bottomless pits of the moors. i think driving in james' angry white van with a wiiiiide view of the road and everything else isnt exactly the best thing to do. especially when youre wicked hungover.

friday night was madness. we got locked into the springvale. mike got to pull some pints! (ive got pictures just need to upload them) i got stoned. omg two hits and i was gone. nice stuff. i was sooooooooo drunk. by the time mike met me at 11.30 i was goooooone. lol. though i was up before him on saturday finishing up my packing (remember boxes!) though he had a wicked bad hangover until late saturday night.

we took the ferry over the irish sea. this ferry was niiiiice. felt more like a mini cruise then a ferry. nice edible food (or were we THAT hungry??) lots of tat to make fun of and wonderful views from all around. i cant wait to upload the pictures. or least see how blurry they came out. lol. but yeah it was nice and surreal. saying goodbye to what had become home wasnt easy. watching it sink in the horizon as the ferry grew closer to dublin was very strange but at the same time calming. its weird to drive here. took something like 3 hours to drive from sheffield to holyhead and like 15 from dublin ports to our house. heh.

(my neighbors cat is in our yard and watching me through the french doors. really cute.. it let me pet it. and even purred! the cat seems to be attracted to our dryer in the work shed... keeps brushing up against it. weird cat.)

mike and i took james to the guiness factory. which was pretty cool to see how the world greatest beer is made. well stout, not beer. i can almost hear barry lecturing me now on the differences. anyways, 8 floors of guinness. pretty crazy. we got a free drink at the gravity bar, which was the most wonderful view ive ever seen. sun setting over the hills and just watching night fall on dublin. totally breathe taking. also, i found out, the annual guinness toast is an american thing and not a guiness one. that was disappointing. and chris was wrong, not rats in the guiness. oh wells.

i also recomend eating at the porter house near grafton street. omg the best pub burger ive ever eaten! *drools* AND they sell my liefkriek which makes me a happy girl :D

anyways today im going to try to get myself established here. heh. hopefuilly ill last here longer then 9 months. im not moving every 9 months, im sick of it. lol. though i love mike more then anything and ill still follow him from here to the end of the earth...

2006-01-26T19:29:00.000Z

new hair for a new city. but ive found my hairdresser when im going to be visiting sheffield.

2006-01-22T18:46:00.000Z

long drunken weekend (arent those the bestest?!) with friday night at the corp. i never felt so old as i did there. hearing korn, limp, new found glory, etc made me feel dated. it was a strange weird feeling for me. at least i didnt go in the pit, then i just would have been a JOKE. i can make an ass out of myself, but jesus fuck, i know when to step back. so yeah, no more moshing. *sigh*. and i would have rather been upstairs in the "indie" aka the pretentious fuckers room. magic numbers, hard fi, james and the early prodigy (compared to later prodigy that was on downstairs) were on. i was happy and cotent there. me, my stella and a fag (pills would have ended the evening perfectly). *sigh* i need to find a club like that in dublin. cant wait to start looking. wewt. sarah and i could rip it up.

last night was out drinking with sarah and pretty much everyone again, and was totally hammered as i had failed to eat yesterday (sans 2 slices of buttered toast, glass of milk & a kitkat). i was drinking for about 8 hours last night. i was supposed to go smoke but declined as i hadnt spoken to mike and wanted to talk to him for a bit.

gah less then a week here. its going to be surreal. though sarah assured me no matter what shes my friend and ive got a place here. that made me feel better <3 tuesday im out with janelle and john for some drunken antics and then wedensday night with sarah, catherine & andrew at catherines house for dinner. my last day of work with telewest is thursday morning. i need to meet mikes mum at her new house in walkley to take photos for mike and for her records just in case the council comes back to her for something bullshit and random that was there when she moved in. go cut 8 and half inches off my hair. come home pack up pretty much everything but the computer, two days worth of clothes & the computer. heh. friday night go get drunk drunk drunk and mike meets us up at the springvale/freedom. then finish up here and wake up at the butt crack of dawn to go into town to trans money into my account. wait for james to stop by to move my shit into his van and then down to industry st to move the rest of mikes possesions into the van as well. then were off to dublin. i think it be like 8 hours in a van. joy. even though its crazy, im living my life. its awesomeness.

then everything mike and i have been working for since that late drunken night in april is coming to fruit. bizzare. a new level to our relationship. i love him so much and cant believe this is happening. we're finally going to be NORMAL. its nice. no more long distance. nadda. and ill be around some americans (as long as they arent cunts) and make some new friends. just weird and bizarre.

for some reason i got bored and was surfing through myspace and west babylons sr high school page. it was weird to see all those people i went to school with and still STUCK in west babylon. why the hell would they stay? i couldnt imagine living in one pathetic town my whole life?? i mean, explore, see the world. theres sooooo much more out there then THAT. i moved back twice and only did it because i had to not because i loved and missed it so. only because i needed to same some cash and get myself back on my feet again and dads house was better then moms. but yeah, i cant fathom why someone would want to stay in one place their whole life. i consider myself lucky ive been able to live pretty much anywhere and ive done it on a wing on a prayer, i dont understand how you couldnt want to live elsewhere???

on saturday it be exactly 9 months since ive landed here and im packing up and moving again. my third country in less then a year. yeah, im pretty fucking lucky.

2006-01-15T17:46:00.000Z

i dont really hate gina, i just think shes jumping to conclusions. i think i just dont like her because she doesnt listen. so yeah. i just cant wait to get out of her hair. if i was her kid i would have been gone a loooooooong time ago. but it could also be me and my hating or parental/authority figures in general. or ones who push themselves into my life. i dont push myself into your life, stay the fuck outta mine. thanks.

anyways, im listening to what mike calls my big gay al cd. i got it yesterday at hmv for like £10 and its the "greatest club anthems". 3 cds and over 60 tracks of music. some are awesome some suck. its not a bad cd to throw on to like work out to or just kill time to. i like it. not a bad buy, i think. anyways its got tracks from eric prydz (who did that awesome video/remix of "call on me" by steve winwood), basement jaxx, darude, ian van dahl (hello 2000!), mylo vs the miami sound machine, audio bullys killer remix of nacy sinatras "shot you down", underworld and more. really great fucking collection. ive got uniting nations "love generation" going as im writting this and yeah.. it just keeps you moving. cant wait to rip and put this on the old ipod. :D

2006-01-15T13:58:00.000Z

i fucking hate mother in laws that cannot fucking listen. seriously. yesterday at the bank i was giving her the money for this stupid holiday that no one can afford to go on and we start talking about houses. i said if we ever had the money id buy a house in the states to rent out.. to make some money on. she fucking took it as mike and i have both decided were packing up once were done with dublin and moving to the us.

so i get in from doing errands in town and hes like "why did you tell mum blahblahblahblah". i told him i didnt and she assumed what i had said and misconstrued it. fucking hell. and its not the first time shes done this. i just wish shed fucking listen. but she doesnt and then causes drama. i cant wait to go. she is the one thing i do not like about sheffield. jesus christ.

oh and to top it off i told him if she makes him choose her or me, she can have him. i love him dearly but not enough to put up with mother in law bullshit for the rest of my life. jesus

2006-01-14T16:14:00.000Z

im maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. the artic monkeys are playing dublin a week BEFORE i get there. i get screwed out of all the concerts. damnit.

grrr.

saw EVERYONE last night, even ben george. im going to miss these guys. i cannot wait to get back to sheffield. its a fucking amazing city. screw madchester and trendy leeds. sheffield is WHERE its at muthafuckers. man. this place is WAAAAAAAAAY better then i ever imagined it to be and not im going... granted its to be with mike and everything but at the same time i feel like im being robbed of everything i wanted, and its for him. i mean i HAVE a GREAT job, great co-workers, it pays enough to keep me in a lifestyle im comforatble with and i have really great friends outside of work who REALLY like me. its just im afraid of losing this and when we come back it not being this way again. i dont know if its fair or right to feel this way. am i being selfish?? or am i right in feeling how i do? i dont know. i just really dont want to move. and i do love him.. and i love my life.. why does it have to split? why cant google just be here in muthafucking sheffield?!?! :(

2006-01-11T21:54:00.000Z

bored.
bored.
bored.
bored.
bored.
bored.
bored.

and i need to pack.
look for a job.
have money.
its gheeeeeeeeeeeeey.

james can move us over to dublin. they wanted to almost charge us frieght for his van on the ferry, but then he removed the step from the van and it became small enough to get the cheap rates. fuckers.

my head hurts. i have too much hair. im cutting about 4 inches off and getting some layers hopefully they dont go overboard with em and fuck up my hair.

2006-01-09T20:10:00.000Z

OMGTHEBIRDISEATINGMYMONITOR!@!#~~!@!!one11!!

never let me get bored :(
this is what i resort to for entertainment. heh.

2006-01-08T22:50:00.000Z

i love being suzy homemaker. heh. i shampooed the carpet in my room for the next person moving in and it feels sooooooooooooooooo nice to walk around barefoot on carpet and not feel grimey. and omg, when cleaning out the shampooer all the THICK black much that came out the carpet. holy shit. i knew i should have cleaned the carpets when i moved in. jesus. but at least the next girl in here will have something nice. as long as she doesnt move the furniture. lol.

i dont want to go to work tomorrow. my voice is still shaky, though most of the congestion is gone. so well see what happens. i just hope its not tooo crazy tomorrow. i hope. fuck it ive got just over 2 weeks left there anyways.

put on some depeche mode for the first time in ages. mmmmdepeche mode. love love love them. just through on postal services album as well. amazing this record is like 2 or so years old and still sound good. i need to find some interpol and listen to them again. having the ipod is making me want to listen to something real.

i think my itunes or my computer is fucked. i dont know. if im downloading or uploading the sound on my mp3s turns to crap. and ive been using itunes again just because im putting in all this effort to re-tag all 30 gigs of music i have on this harddrive i should at least get to appreciate it more then on the nano. heh. its just weird.

anyways yeah, its nice walking on clean carpets. i think its going to be intresting living together, as long as we dont kill one another.. which is what im fearing the most.

2006-01-04T22:56:00.000Z

found some myspaces of intrest:
Michael Ceras (George Michael) & Alia Shawkats (Maeby)

thank me if you want. and please please please please please please please please watch the last 4 episoides of arrested developement!!! since this show is on its last legs and should not be cancelled!!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

okay im in the mood to post, again. i guess this is what being sick does to you and the fact i dont want to go to bed (i fucking hate working earlies)

so for christmas i was spoiled. from mike i receieved the most awesomest gifts.. heheh... i got:

- 17" flat screen monitor
- 200 gig seagate harddrive (hello movies!!)
- 512mb xD memory card for my digi cam
- a dock for my nano (and he loved his universal dock and we looked like such dorks with both docks sitting side by side on my desk... ahhhh)

from my mom i got:
- bras and underwear
- 2 pairs of size 18 jeans (wooo to losing over 2 dress sizes)
- 2 jars of jif peanut butter. (so with the one jar mike brought back from cali for me ive got enough to last me to god knows when.. lol)

joanne sent:
- a scarf with gloves (though she gave that to me when she was here)
- a hooded zip up sweatshirt

dad sent us:
- $250 in cash for both of us!!

granddad sent:
- £100 for the both of us. i need to get a hold of him. im going to try tomorrow if not i need to write a letter.

his family gave me:
- satin pajams from marks and sparks (gina - his mum)
- a black evening bag (jennie - 6 yr old sister)
- candles (sam - his older sister)
and i think his brother gave me something im not too sure
- box of ferraro rochers chocolates (his auntie janet & uncle sam)

i think i made out pretty well. i was not expecting to get more then a card or something for the holidays and whoa. yeah thank you notes abound. lol.

and while he was here we spent lots and lots of time intoxicated. sooo much drinking and eating of pizza, i felt like i was back in ny. lol.

nye rocked our socks, even though it was quiet and spent with only richard & sarah. we went to dinner (spent over £100) on eccelsall (i just butchered that) road and the waitress was nasty to us because a) we shared starters and b) sarah asked if she could smoke where we were sitting. but dinner was excellant and we cant wait to go to vitos on south road next time mike and i are back in town. i loved the food. we hopped into a cab back to walkley and went to the freedom. it was kinda boring there. lots of older local people and really quiet. we had a few pints (and i had already started to mix - wine at dinner 2 pints of lager at the freedom and some tart fuel) and headed over to sarah and richards place to count down to midnight. watched something go on in london (let me say, living in the nyc area really spoils you.. and having dick clarck.. nothing like it in the world. i missed watching the ball drop...), took a few pills and chased them with some fine free champagne. lol the night was such a blur (though last night on the way to madchester, i found some intresting photos on my camera phone!!!). we didnt pass out till 7.30am on new years day and sarah was STILL dancing. richard literally had to drag her upstairs. lol. it was a GREAT night. probably the best new years eve ive ever had. plus, according to mike, one his as well.

but yeah it was great having mike back here. we all miss him and its just going to suck when i move because the people we all love wont be there with us (even though were TRYING to convince sarah shes good enough to work at google as well...) and its just going to be mike and me. which is fine, but its better when theres more with you. im going to miss sarah. shes seriously the first real female friend ive ever had. shes real. shes not into back stabbing or gossiping (much) about people. shes just fucking cool and its fucking nice to have it. and she wont try to steal my boyfriend or ruin my life which is even nicer.

2006-01-04T14:10:00.000Z

comments are back - yay! - though not as i want them. bloggers comments system isnt that customizable, at least in its code, so everything is now centered and ghey.

updated the archive, so now youll be able to read well into december 2006 ;)

was going to post a huge post about mike being here for 10 days, what i got and did over the holidays, but i cant be bothered now since ive spent two hours trying to fix the fucking comment system. maybe tomorrow night.

i move in 24 days. aCk. and ive got sooo much to do. and i need to email my landlord to tell her to let me know when people are coming to view my room so i can keep it neat. right now it looks like a tornado blew through it.

im also sick, so that doesnt help with my temperment atm. started to come down with something on new years eve. i dont know if its because i was ginas house for 2 days with her heavy smoking and then with sarah all week and shes a heavy smoker as well and it just kicked off something or ive just gotten what everyone else in sheffield seems to have. i dont know. so right now im off from work (left early yesterday) and doped up on meds. i need some food so ill probably go get dressed now and walk down to the co-op to get some bread and drinkage.

also, one more thing, hope everyone (all 6 of you who read this thing) had a very healthy and happy holidays and have a great new year :)

2005-12-22T23:13:00.000Z

guess who this adoranble teen is??
(and no shes not liz phairs daughter.. - who i think actually had a son... oooh if liz phairs son and this girl were to get together to have babies imagine how awesome theyd be?!?!?)

yeap didnt lil frances grow up to be just the most beautiful teenager youve ever seen?? kurt, you should be proud :) jesus shes a beautiful thing. shes going to grow into a gorgeous woman. and apparently from the few interviews shes given shes quite well rounded and has a head on her shoulders. i guess you have to be when youre mother is a train wreck
but kudos to courtney. if she ever did one thing right it was have the bean.

2005-12-19T21:41:00.000Z

so apple took back my nano and replaced it with a new one. bad battery apparently. charged up the new one and its given me proper battery signals so hopefully all goes well from now on. otherwise ill be jumping over the genius bar and given the boys a piece of my mind.

discovered podcasts. these could be fun. its like pirate radio but better. maybe. lol. but yeah check out bandsundertheradar on iTunes... youll thank me :) i mean most of it is pretty recent and current.. nothing too like "HOLYCRAPWHEREDIDTHISBANDCOMEFROMANDWHERECANIHEARMORE?!?!?" but if you want to hear a sample of the current buzz bands, then this is the place for you. ill update new and current podcasts.. i think i may add a link on the side. dont know yet.

2005-12-18T22:36:00.000Z

i want to go to our home, now.

2005-12-14T22:52:00.000Z

uuuh yeah. i was supposed to be christmas shopping for others not me. oopsie.

2005-12-13T22:53:00.000Z

still exhausted from dublin. failed to get my drink on, but i did get my groove (!!!) and do some touristy things...

the front of OUR house

we're literally fiv walking minutes, if that, from the tram... two stops away from the newest mall in the area comeplete with a bennigans, for those who need authentic irish american grub. lol.

more later when im not exhausted.

2005-12-07T20:07:00.000Z

bahahaha i can fit into clothes i havent worn in well over 3 years. this is fucking awesome.

and i leave for dublin tomorrow AND he comes home tomorrow as well!!!

2005-12-01T20:43:00.000Z

btw life is getting better.
we're talking marriage (yippee!!!) and i cant wait to see him next week. oooh this time next week ill be on a plane to dubliiiiiiiiiiiiin.. i cannot fucking wait.

and im typing this in my blog just in case mary ever googles her name

MARY BETH FISHER OF SWINDON IS REALLY FUCKING COOL.

cheers. :)

ps. im addicted to the smiths. damn you morrisey.

2005-12-01T20:27:00.000Z

yeah i need to quit myspace. toooo many fucking people have found me and its creeping me the fuck out. my ex "best" friend, ricks WIFE found me and started emailing me.. a bunch of the mtv YaCk kids have found me and now... people from high school have found me.. and because of that, i REMOVED my name (except for a .) from being able to be searched for so i can still move on with my life and this morning i get a myspace message from

get ready for it...

my emotionally abusive ex boyfriend who has somehow found me trying "not" to start anything but wanted to say whats up. wtf?!?!? yeah... hes not mental at all. thats just like fucked. you know?? gah.

like i dont know why im posting this.. i just think its FUCKING weird.. i havent talked to this kid in like 5 years.. and yet he feels the need to message me? if i havent kept in touch with you it means i dont want to!!!! jesus.

anyways, he sent me this, which made me giggle.

well well

Body: Hey what's up looks like you can find just about anyone on this thing, its' surprising how many people are on myspace it's kinda crazy..

I’m not trying to start anything with you or ask for anything none of that really matter to me. I really have too much going on to even care anymore.

I was just looking for some people and your name came up and there you were. I won’t even ask to be added in fact that’s not what I’m looking for I just wanted to say hi and see how everything is with you that's about all. so if you don’t wanna talk just don’t respond that's cool with me and I wont bother you again.

Regards

Mike

weird.

anyways hes probably read this and laughed at out loud because id still post in my blog and he "never" let me. he thought MY thoughts shouldnt be aired..

anyways i think im airing out shit that ive been over since i wised up and dumped him. so yeah... im just gunna move on. lol.

2005-11-29T20:58:00.000Z

i think i want to go home.

2005-11-29T19:03:00.000Z

i want to be left alone :(

i HATE when i go through these phases but i just need to be alone, away from EVERYONE for like a week. everyone around me is getting too much. no mike work is hectic im stressed im alone.. i just need to be away from everything for a week to decompress and i dont think ill get that chance to do so. and i REALLY need it. i went off at mike for like no reason at all. :\

2005-11-26T22:35:00.000Z

you know youre drunk when staring at your nose is enjoyable.
heh.

2005-11-19T23:43:00.000Z

im on pills for the first time in 5 yeats
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

i want himp mike.

and stuff on catsrules.

sleepy kerri berry
and i thik i makde a sdhitthre pm ufck./.

i suck adn im fassy./

hzaahha

2005-11-18T21:42:00.000Z

to quote quagmire, giggitygiggitygiggitty

robbie is coming to dublin on 7 june 2006 and im going to see him.. yummy yummy

and i should drink n blog. or sing. ive been singing along to robbie tonight. loudly. i dont think my housemate is in.
or post.
and ive got a bottle of wine down stairs that has my name on it. mmhmmm il be drunk. and have a hangover at the bank. weee...

when theres no love in town
this new century keeps bringing you down
all the places you have been
trying to find
a love supreme....

2005-11-18T21:18:00.000Z

is it wrong i wish mike had sent these to me instead of winning them at work?

2005-11-13T21:52:00.000Z

i miss him.
i miss his kisses
i miss his touch
i miss the sound of how he giggles when i do something daft
i miss the way he looks at me.
i miss his hugs and his touch
god 24 days left and the last week has felt like a month. i dont understand WHY he had to go. i swear after this no more business trips of this distance unless i can go along. this is totally ridiculous.

i think i should just go to bed. make my life easier. and at least this week im on lates so i can get up at a decent time and then talk/email him while at work.

its just shit. i need this man

I was alone, I took a ride,
I didn't know what I would find there
Another road where maybe I could see another kind of mind there

Ooh, then I suddenly see you,
Ooh, did I tell you I need you
Every single day of my life

You didn't run, you didn't lie
You knew I wanted just to hold you
And had you gone you knew in time we'd meet again
For I had told you

Ooh, you were meant to be near me
Ooh, and I want you hear me
Say we'll be together every day

Got to get you into my life

What can I do, what can I be,
When I'm with you I want to stay there
If I'm true I'll never leave
And if I do I know the way there

Ooh, then I suddenly see you,
Ooh, did I tell you I need you
Every single day of my life

Got to get you into my life
Got to get you into my life

I was alone, I took a ride,
I didn't know what I would find there
Another road where maybe I could see another kind of mind there

Then suddenly I see you,
Did I tell you I need you...

2005-11-13T18:14:00.000Z

me right now

I AM FREEZING MY ASS OFF.
i am currently sitting in my room with a turtleneck sweater, heavy hooded sweatshirt and gloves on my fingers so i can stay warm. holy fuck i didnt think it be this cold here? have people not heard of something called INSULATION??? seriously. fucking freexing my tits off here. i just cant get warm. i am so buying a space heater and a electric blanket next month.

jesus christ i need to be warm and the only way to get warm is to cook and i dont need to get fatter then i already am.

2005-11-12T22:12:00.000Z

even though the dvd burner mike gave me has died, and im without dvd entertainment, im still going to try to enjoy my boring night (even without him being around.. but yeah...). drinking some liefmans kriekbier (mmm cherries) and have some beatles on the foxytunes and im happy gal. forgot how much i loved this album, even when i was small, i remember this being one of the records id ask my dad to play and he would. but i have a feeling yellow submarine has something to do with that as well. so some 6% cherry beer and some lennon/mccartney on this chilly evening and i think im good to go.

also, just some random words.. what the fuck is going on with america? i mean im happy with the pseudo democrat bloomberg getting back in as nyc mayor (though im stilla firm believer that if 9/11 never happened it be green who would have been re-elected but thats neither here nor there) and jersey has a dem govenor along with virginia. which is good. things are looking up for the dems to still fuck up the race in 2008. heh. well see what happens. but yeah id like to have a good long hard talk to the people who live in kansas. apparently charles darwin is a fucking lunatic and even though our genes tell us weve all evolved from something else, and its fact, apparently saying we were dropped from the skys because some book written by people 4 or 5 lines down after the fact happen/story was originally told is more factual. yeap. gotta love america. fucking hell.

im buzzed. so if not making sense or using run ons, thats why. heh. yay 6% alcohol.

im trying to make mike go down to san fran to see some of the place kerouac haunted back in the late 40's & 50's. he said hell try. who knows. i hope so. i also found this kick ass poster i want for the house. i think it would look cool framed. but im also a huge on the road fan so i might be slightly biased.

you know i was thinking when mike and i eventually get married i wanted to dance to a ryan adams or dmb song.. but i think i want the beatles. but my parents used the beatles and yeah.. hmmm but i really love got to get you into my life... oh man. i do need him. im lost without him. heh. :[

anyways... last weekend i was way to drunk i didnt really recover till tuesday. heh. i guess that means i had fun. lol.

and i cancelled my return trip back to ny tonight. felt strange. i really did think i would be going back. i still think hes going to dump me on tuesday morning just to fuck with me like that. and just because i have that kind of luck. heh. but he kept asking me why i was saying that.. and i know he does love me, what i dont know is if he wants to stay with me. thats the part thats scary. but he told me not to be daft. ill stop being daft on wednesday morning.

2005-11-09T18:05:00.000Z

apparently this three year old blog is only worth: $1,129.08.
which is more than i thought...

My blog is worth $1,129.08.
How much is your blog worth?

2005-11-01T19:56:00.000Z

hahahah holy shit this cartoon rocks.

2005-10-22T12:54:00.000+01:00

*giggles*
i love finding online comics

http://www.explosm.net/comics/view.asp?id=352
warning:
its not the most politically correct humour out there, but at least its funny!

2005-10-21T22:07:00.000+01:00

seriously this is THE album of the moment. i dont know why i cant STOP listening. jesus christ i love ryan adams. and i know im not the only posting about this man in their blogs and raving and raving (or ranting about his tantrums) about his greatness (or maybe the idea of him being greatness?) but yeah i just cant get enough of him. he has really replaced dave matthews band as my current favorite. hes been on my ipod since i bought it. almost 2 gigs worth of released/live/un-released stuff are my hard drive. jesus. if i still had my webhost id upload something for anyone passing by here (or the four regular readers i seem to have...) to download. man he rules.

and for some reason my comments arent working and i cant figure out how to edit out teknik and add in bloggers own in my template without fucking shit up. i need to know someone who is decent with HTML and not servers to help me. i miss my comments. its nice when you get them.

joanne arrives tomorrow afternoon. im excited. i still havent told my housemate that shes going to be here for 3 days but shes staying in my room so it shouldnt be an issue. oh wells whats the worst thats going to happen? i leave sometime in january, and they are aware of it. so theres no real reason to push me out sooner than that. but yeah im excited. we're going to go to pizza express for dinner tomorrow night (shes REALLY, maybe TOOO, excited to go...) and either the movies to see the new wallace & gromit flick or over to the devonshire cat for some drinks. i dont know yet. we still need to do shit on sunday and early monday (when she leaves to go down to london). maybe movies sunday afternoon and eat at a weatherspoons or something. or the cafe up the road, though that place isnt as great as i thought it was. or maybe it was always shit and i just got an off day where food was decent. anyways back to joanne, shes really excited, bought a new digital camera n all to document her trip. lol its good to see her finally boy some toys. shes got the iBook n now this. now to get her a real mp3 player and she'll be trendy! haha shes really excited about it though, she actually sent me the first picture (well the fourth but shh) she took last night. silly girl. i cant wait to see her tomorrow afternoon at the train station. i miss that bitch.

oh and to end on some ryan adams....

I can go on, but I won't bore you
Lucky in life, not in love
I make mistakes like anybody
Anyone foolish to love me that much

I'm a little shaky gotta learn how to fight
The moon shines on the boulevard, baby let's ride
If you gotta look back, don't look down
Our love went cold and turned to ice

2005-10-18T23:11:00.000+01:00

dear people of the world, life is more than the 4 years of high school and college. once you realize that, you can get on with your life and really start LIVING.

2005-10-17T23:49:00.000+01:00

why the fuck do i care what they said about me months ago?
i shouldnt. im happy now. and people dont know everything about me, nor know what ive been through or felt. maybe thats why it hurts so cause i let most things run off my back about others or tell them how it is up front, i expect others to do the same. maybe thats expecting too much from people?

2005-10-17T21:39:00.000+01:00

i wanna go to zurich and eat toblerone and swiss cheese.
apparently its really pretty, and cold and expensive. mike just ate out at the spaghetti factory (and very weird an american chain like that is in a place like switzerland, weirdness) and it cost him about £15 for a salad, spaghetti with meatballs and "some tomato thingy" (to use mikes words). sounds good but waaay too expensive. but on second thought thats like going to pizza express on a sunday afternoon. its only a few quid less. anyways, i think its overprices what he paid.

i also miss him lots. n lots n lots n lots. just over a week and a half till i see my sexy again!!!!

2005-10-16T11:51:00.000+01:00

mike is going to kill me for posting this buuuuuuuuuut:

btw, those are josh's fingers behind mikes head

do they or do they not look alike? seriously mike hates the fact he looks like shaun murphy, but they do look like they are long lost twins or something. who the hell knows. but sarah, richard and i are really trying to convince him to dress up like him for halloween. it be a pisser.

btw, babe, i think youre waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better looking than murphy is.

2005-10-15T14:01:00.000+01:00

im bored. i was supposed to go out with sarah this afternoon to shop for mikes birthday gift but i dont think thats happening. to kill time i just wrote out my christmas cards to my aunts n uncle n cousins. im broke i spent £18 on one and half beers last night and didnt have that great of a time. i mean i did but didnt cause i wound up with a headache and had to go home early. i also wound up at a bar that mike hadnt even heard of. and it cost me £6 to take a taxi home, alone, afterwards. i liked meeting my co-workers n all i just wish it didnt cost me a fortune. fuck.

im also missing mike, big time. tomorrow he flies out to switzerland. for a week. at least hell have internet access then, and i hopefully wont have to top again this week other wise ill be piss poor. fucking hell.

joanne comes satuyrday. shes excited and im not because im broke :( and i dont want her t pay for us. and it just sucks if she was to arrive a week later, i could have taken care of her. i hate being paid once a month bullshit. i miss her though. i cant wait to see her, i just hate that im broke and i hope it doesnt ruin her stay.

i get to see mike in 13 days. whoohoo. im going to meet him at manchester airport since his flight gets in so late. come home from work, shower & change then rush to get a taxi to the train station and go to manchester. hopefully it will only cost me £20. hopefully. i cant wait to be back in his arms. i love him so. i miss him.

fuck it, i miss everyone.

2005-10-10T23:25:00.001+01:00

dont tell mike but i am in absolute love with my kitchen!!!! i cant wait to cook in it! and other things! lol. aHHHHHHHHHH this house is amazing and its mine!!

and my bedroom is HUGE.. oh my god. and just wow. i cant wait to get there and actually see it in person. my mother is even impressed by the place, shes going to try to get over to see me!! #@$!$@#%!^$^ fucking awesome. though i think its just because shes always wanted to go to ireland (which is odd cause shes been to places like yugoslavia and greece) and never ever been considering it was only a boat/ferry ride away.

ahh i love it. i still cant believe this is all happening!!!

and ps thank you blogger for adding "recover post" especially when it was your fault it was lost!!!

2005-10-10T20:59:00.000+01:00

so mike FINALLY posted pictures of our place!! it is soo fucking gorgeous! i cant wait to get there!! omg.. love love love it :D

2005-10-09T14:37:00.000+01:00

rofl. im GHETTO. lol. in order to wash and dry my bedding i had to install a clothes line into my bedroom. its removable (i hope i didnt tie the knots tooooo tightly otherwise im fucked) and cost less than £2 to put it together. lol. and it seems to be working. the sheets are damp, but by bedtime tonight they will be dry. next week i get to wash my duvet cover! wewt. clean bedding. i love it.

work is going good, and its amazing how one lil emaiul can brighten your day. my co-work mary in sales sent me an email applauding me for dooing something right. apparently people whove been there for years couldnt do what ive done. and it really wasnt much, just making sure i set up an email lead in the correct format. lol. oh wells. it made my day. and i think it made marys (who is a lil off her rocker but still cool as shit)

im getting closer to sarah. her and richard are really taking care of me. they are so awesome. love love em. been drinking and had dinner together a few times since mike has been gone. i need to get em over here. i just never know when my house mate will be out of the house so i can entertain without annoying anyone. but yeah theyve been awesome!! love love em. next weekend sarah and i are going to go shopping for mikes birthday gift. shes thinking of getting him a clock for our place (did i mention it has an alarm? well it does! and its located walking distance to dublins answer to meadowhell) and so yeah. its gunna be fun. its nice, correction, its GREAT having girlfriends again. though im still wary, i know not all females are backstabbing and manipulative witches. wewt.

my friend robin, who lives in holland, has asked me to come and visit him soon. i want to. i just hope i can afford to do that and see mike both. and mike really doesnt want me to go by myself. i think thats him being jealous. robin just wants to meet people and i do too. i dont want to fuck him (ew) just see a place ive always wanted to go to and get really fucking high. its okay for him to do it but not me. heh im gunna. well try to the best of my ablity. i think ill be able to swing btoh if im no longer being emergency taxed. its really killing me. ill get a nice refund at the end of the year, i just rather have the money now. you know? grrr. still broke. still broke.

ive also been listening to more music again - goldfrapp, the magic numbers, faithless & franz ferdinand are on constant rotation. along with the two new ryan adams & the cardinals records. everything is sooo good. even things that pass the time like james blunt & kt tunstall are great listening. ahhh oh how i hate to be far from music. i love love it so. i just wish there were more indie music venues in the area and more artists came around. theres sheffied uni, but yeah that means going to shows with STUDENTS. boo. lol. oh wells. ill get to something soon. and on my own.

2005-10-05T18:07:00.000+01:00

now they are sending him to switzerland.
wtf????

god damn you.

2005-10-04T23:09:00.000+01:00

weve got a place - yay!
its gorgeous and expensive and everything in there is brand spanking new. when mike viewed the place they were just hanging the lights n stuff. wewt.

he still has to go to mountianview, though its next month. not too bad. i was just hoping to spend thanksgiving day with him. i think i need to take the day off. thats going to be hard to fucking handle. seriously. hell im already crying and its just under two months away.

he still has to go to california for a month.
he still has to go to california for a month :[

and telewest and ntl merged so theres slight hope for me yet when i move to dublin. just some.

2005-10-01T19:00:00.000+01:00

this is what happens when im bored, more posting:

qoute:

"In order to beat them, it is necessary for Democrats to get some backbone, give as good as they get, brook no compromise, drive out Democrats who are interested in "appeasing" the right wing, and enforce a more clearly progressive agenda. The country, finally knowing what we stand for and seeing a sharp contrast, will rally to our side and thereby usher in a new progressive era."

thats from barack obamas blog. this man is a genius. hes a true democrat and liberal and what america needs. im not going to go on and on since i know jack about politics, but i just thought id post this here, maybe someone will stumble upon it and see not everyone in the states are evil war mongers.

2005-10-01T10:03:00.000+01:00

another fuck you to google.
why the fuck does he need one god damn month in mountian view to train?!?! cant they do it in dublin?!?! fucking assholes.

2005-09-30T19:08:00.000+01:00

its not fucking fair.
i hate you google. i do i do. fucking stop keeping us apart. all we want to do is be together and have a normal and healthy relationship.

i fucking MISS him like theres no tomorrow. tears are ready to run down my face. im alone. fucking all alone. hes my other half and hes gone, even if its temporarily. fucking hell this sucks. gah. i need him :( seeing him every other weekend will suck. and be an expense i cant really afford and neither can he and ugh.

fuck this shit.

2005-09-12T22:28:00.000+01:00

fainting goats (best viewed in IE due to codec issues)
omg this is so damn awesome. i want one as a pet. fucking cool as hell.

2005-09-11T23:11:00.000+01:00

fuck you evil co worker who brought a stupid ass & nasty head cold into our office. im sick as a dog with it and cant miss work. fuck you. i hate being sick

2005-09-10T23:44:00.000+01:00

wtf? how does THIS happen? ive gone from being a annoying 42DD to a 48E!!! fucking hell. and i swear even though ive lost over 30 pounds, my tits got bigger. how does this fucking happen?? this is annoying as hell. i was having a hard enough time finding a decent bra being a 42DD, now its going to be damn near impossible to find anything in a 48 fucking E cup. god fucking damnit. the only person not pissed about this is mike. gah. men.

2005-09-03T22:47:00.000+01:00

first things first... hurricane katrina...two clicks lets you donate $1 towards the Red Cross of Greater New York though only up to $100,000, every bit helps at this time. please do yours to help out those not as fortunate. this is the only way i can contribute at the time since i still lack my own bank account and can not send money through paypal. ugh. this is a terrible terrible terrible tragedy and my heart goes out to every single person affected by this situation.

secondly, you can view pictures of my trip to castleton here. i walked ten miles and holy fuck. it was awesome. at this moment in time only a handful of photos are up but more to come through time. i just cant be bothered to upload all twenty or so.

lastly, my blog is now three years old. its come a long way baby (sorry virgina slims) and traveled from new york, philladelphia, back to new york, sheffield and now dublin (mike got a job with google dublin so im moving there when the lease on my place is up!). strange how much can happen in just only three years, you know? when i started this thing i was sad and lonely and here i am happy and madly in love (marriage is being discussed!!!) and jsut wow. its so freaking weird how things can just change. im just pissed i havent been able to update as much as i like since i lack the internets. but soon, i shall have it in my place. weeee. though it be on plusnet dsl (boo) its better than nothing and its high speed since i cant get the free internet/tv/phone deal work gives away because im too far away from the fucking lines and they wont dig!! grrrr. lol. oh wells. we already have dsl set up i just dont know with who. anyways thats all for now..

2005-08-22T00:14:00.000+01:00

fettucini alfredo with penne

look out emril & alton brown.. im learning how to cook and im armed with my betty crocker cook book. muahahahah. and it was good and filling and fucking parmasean cheese costs a fucking buttload here in the uk. either way it was good. i left both mike and josh bloated from too much foodage. hehehe

and i quit my crappy ass temp job. muahahha.

2005-08-14T12:32:00.000+01:00

punch drunk at a wedding.

last night.
wedding.
oh so drunk (i walked down the street in my socks?!?)
so happy for andrew & catherine